Symmetrical McVillages

The forces of nature decided I deserved a minor slice of hell, thus I’ve been thrust into the bowels of suburban Colorado. My flight back to NYC has been delayed numerous times...we’re an hour behind at the moment. If the rotten son of a bitch next to me doesn’t shut off his goddamn cellular phone, I’m going to eat the fucking thing. The professional looking woman behind me has been chatting away in the loudest voice possible on her cellular phone for the past hour…she has some sort of contraption attached to her ear that resembles those electronic devices used to tag cattle before they’re slaughtered …the organization has been very good to her, she’s looking forward to the boondoggle in Scottsdale, she’s cheating on her husband at the moment...she has her world by the balls…the antithesis of an iconic sitcom character. Bless her heart. The President of the United States is, currently, presenting his latest policy regarding this country’s energy concerns. Normally, I’d be all over this. At this point, my brain hurts and the most I can tolerate are cartoons and/or pornography although American politics resembles both these days. Fuck it, I could never look away from a train wreck…

Suburban sprawl, corporate parks, symmetrical McVillages, and chemical plants have consumed this state. The county where we stayed is owned by a holding company (an advanced technology environment with powers greater than god almighty) who decided to “re-arrange” the borders of the towns contained therein in order to evade taxes and build strip malls as far as the eye can see. Major retail corporations and their shareholders can reap the benefits of cheap labor and low taxes. Local businesses and entrepreneurs are “eliminated.” People definitely lost their lives as a result of this environmental “reorg.”

Nothing, but country music and it’s everywhere. Not Johnny Cash country, but some vapid, retarded, genetic mutation that can only sell in a retail environment where one can buy recorded music, snow tires, undergarments that rise above the waist, pop tarts, rubbers, and a hand gun in the same trip. Bars don’t exist and strong drink is very hard to come by but food products come in three sizes: “large,” “super,” and “king.” The air here is thin and I get fatigued easily. The landscapes are gorgeous but are eclipsed by massive shrouds of clouds being emitted from the chemical plants. God, no wonder everyone hates us…I don’t blame ‘em a bit. The President is still yammering away…addressing questions…selling himself…calming the masses. Stop. Enjoy silence.
-title-